Baystate Recovery Center Blog

How to Tell Your Date You Are Sober

How to Tell Your Date You Are Sober

One of the most common difficulties we hear about when it comes to recovery is the difficulty of going back to dating once you’re sober. Whether we like it or not, drinking and even substance use are quite popular so stating you’re sober may elicit uncomfortable reactions in potential dates. On top of that, most dates take place in locations that serve alcohol so the topic may come up sooner that you’d like. Although you can’t control another person’s attitude towards sobriety, you can take these simple steps to break the ice on the topic.

Always Be Upfront

Honesty is truly the best policy in this case. Disclosing you’re sober as quickly as possible is almost always the best option, as it can prevent awkward conversations down the line. If you’re on dating apps, it’s a good idea to mention you’re sober in your bio. You may choose to mention it off-handedly or to elaborate a bit and talk about your journey in recovery. If you’re meeting people the old-fashioned way, you just have to find a way to naturally include it in the conversation. Remember that being in recovery and choosing sobriety is a great achievement and you deserve to feel proud — so don’t be shy about telling people all about it.

Share More About Your Journey When You’re Comfortable

Recovery is a deeply meaningful and emotionally fraught process, so not many people will be comfortable opening up about it during the first few dates. However, once you’ve gotten to know the person a bit more and you’ve grown to feel more comfortable with them. You may choose to talk about recovery in a bit more depth. A lot of people find that being honest about their past struggles helps them build intimacy and a real sense of trust. Of course, you should never feel pressured to disclose more that you’re comfortable with — there are always going to be certain things that you don’t want to talk about until you know them very well. Although being vulnerable is usually the best option, there’s always the risk that they’ll react negatively to just story or judge you unfairly. If that happens, you might feel hurt and rejected but ultimately, consider this to be a bullet dodged.

Take the Next Step with Baystate Recovery Center

We know how challenging recovery can be for anyone. Whether you’re just now taking the first step towards your recovery or you’ve already made some progress, we’re here to offer support. Our highly-trained clinicians and team members always work to meet everyone’s unique needs and to personalize treatment plans. Please contact us now and our helpful team members will go through your options with you.

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