Many couples enjoy relaxing together over a bottle of wine, going out for cocktails, or having a beer and playing pool on a date. Sometimes, though, drinking ceases to be a fun shared activity and starts causing problems in the relationship. You may be struggling with your own alcohol addiction or worried about your partner’s drinking. When does drinking become a problem in your relationship, and what are the signs?
Alcohol abuse can stir up many negative emotions, and many people who suffer from this disease may not be the same person sober as they are when they’re drinking. Sadly, drinking can destroy relationships between family and lovers. Knowing how to spot red flags can help you get the treatment you need before it’s too late.
Lack of Trust
Unfortunately, one thing that is consistent about addicts is that they will lie and try to cover up things to protect their addiction. It’s the nature of the disease, but it’s also a trust killer in relationships. If the alcoholic partner feels judged by the other about their drinking, they may double down and lie more, while the non-drinking partner feels betrayed. Sometimes, though the drinker is open about their drinking, but because alcohol increases one’s tendency to lie and impairs judgment, they may lie about other things in their life, from job issues to money. Lack of trust is one of the main reasons that people end relationships.
Drinking Affects Shared Finances
Drinking can be an expensive hobby, and spending money on alcohol instead of needs for the family can make any partner feel resentful. Furthermore, daily hangovers can impact your job performance, making it harder to advance in your career or even hold a job. If your alcohol use makes it harder for you to fulfill your financial obligations to your family, then you may wish to seek help to quit.
The Impact on Your Children
Your drinking habits may have more effect on your children than you realize. If drinking causes you to provoke fights with your partner, your kids may witness this and become distressed, confused, and upset. Or, if you’re too hungover to care for your children or play with them, you could be neglecting them and causing serious psychological harm. Children of alcoholic parents may be more at-risk themselves become addicted to alcohol or drugs, and have a higher instance of mental illnesses like depression and anxiety.
Replacing Time and Energy Dedicated to Your Partner With Alcohol
Eventually, alcoholics place drinking above everything else they value in life, from spending time with their children to work obligations and their intimacy and time with their partner. When they begin looking forward to their next drink or can’t relax and enjoy themselves with their partner without drinking, their commitment to one another is threatened. This may carry over into the bedroom, as well, since alcohol can have a significant effect on the libido.
Is Your Drinking Affecting Your Relationship?
If you’re having trouble in your relationship because of your drinking, there is hope. At Baystate Recovery Center, we take a holistic approach to helping people addicted to alcohol achieve and maintain sobriety, with intensive therapy and aftercare support, including family counseling to help rebuild your relationships. Contact us today to learn more about your options.